Well we are trying to cope with the time change here in Banff and I have to say I'm not to happy about losing an hour of sleep. However I am glad that it occurs on on a Sunday when I get to go into work a little later than on my regular work week.
By God's grace, my sermon was really well received this past sabbath. I was confident that it had been well constructed and met the requirements of "offering instruction, providing encouragement, and inspiring growth". Yes, it looked good on paper, but I knew that actually delivering it on the pulpit was a whole different story. I guess it is very much like being able to play freely on my saxophone at home but choking a bit when I perform onstage if I haven't done it in a while. Adrenalin, your friend if you train it, can be your greatest enemy. These days I am still drained after I preach because of this (explanation for why I tend to become very quiet afterward).
I believe God still fills in the gaps when you commit your message to Him (and yes I call Him "Him". If the Almighty objected to that, I am sure He would have made it known in a concise way by now personally.) He knows when you have sincerely tried and He takes this effort and amplifies it. I hold on to this when a wave of nervousness engulfs me. Only through the Spirit!
Also, one of things I enjoyed this sabbath was chatting with my younger sister Lily via our BlackBerrys. She on her Bold and I on my Curve. We talked for a while via BlackBerry Messenger (BBm) and since it was the weekend, I finally called her for free.
The beginning of this year and the family crises that ensued were a weighted reminder that each member lives so far apart from each other these days. The events that transpired really shook me, and bore in me a determination to shape, as us much as any person can, circumstances so that I can be closer to my siblings and parents. For now it is a piece of technology that connects us, but I hope God allows for more to happen to facilitate this wish.
My wife is leaving for the Philippines this coming weekend to spend much needed time with her family. I will miss her dearly while she is gone. "I've grown accustomed to her face." and indeed "she makes the day begin." The trip will leave a significant dent in our finances but I understand the need to go home. Family is important and aside from God, family is everything.
I know that people have noticed a change in me. I am not so easily available these days to do things (even though I regularly update Facebook and post blogs on here). If you want to know how I'm doing read my stuff... BBm me a message... My pin is on my Facebook profile... Because when I get home all I want is to spend time with my wife and check up on the fam.
My father gave a piece of advise that really rang through to me as he prepared to drive to Ontario this past week (he is now on his way and regularly updates us with his progress via his iPhone). He said that one should sit down and write out on paper what their priorities are. He said in so doing we should focus on what we really value and need with honesty so we can really see what is really needed versus what is simply a want. While he meant this to be study of finances, I think it also applies to life in general. In a world cluttered with distractions, focus is direly needed.
For now I end this with one final reflection:
It takes a strong person to say sorry but and even stronger heart to forgive.
Many people seemed to be preoccupied by the wrongs done to them of late. Whether there is a true foundation for their pain, anger and or frustration is another discussion. But the feelings are real and so I acknowledge them. (Confused? This has everything to do with aspects of my family crises!)
I think we have turned a good sense of justice and a need for fairness into an evil thing especially when it comes to our own personal sense of self-preservation. There is something to be said about following the example that Christ left us. He was quick to forgive, quick to reconcile, and quick to to re-establish. (Read Matthew 18:22 and the story that occurs previous.)
I am no saint. I am done some horrible wrongs in the past and I do still bear the burden of current sins of my own own choice. But God offers a way out and it is through forgiveness.
So I ask for it, by God's grace I grant it, and I hope we all can too...
It is crazy what what we learn along the way. It is even crazier if what we learn is powerful enough to effect change at our very core.
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