Status Update Reflections

I'm usually too tired to update my blog unless there is a subject worth writing about. Such is the case this time...

I love Facebook. It is way for me to keep touch with my friends and family especially during an era when we are spread out to the four corners of the earth. I love it when my sisters post pictures and comments online because it is as if I get to see into their lives often in near real-time and even though we are miles apart, I still feel a part of their lives. (Love you siblings!)

But what Facebook is NOT for is a place to air out your grievances against specific individuals. Facebook is NOT a place to write slanderous things about others. People others are watching! Not just your 500 + friends but anyone who is connected to them (which could potentially be the whole online planet!)

In this day and age your digital persona carries a lot of weight. Potential employers Google you to see what your digital footprint says about you (well what YOU "says" about YOU bcause it is You who probably posted it). Try doing it with your name and you'll be surprised by what the search engine pulls up.

There is far better expert commentary out there on the subject so I won't continue. Lets just sum it up with the following:

Better be comfortable with EVERYONE reading what you write on here because once you put it out there in cyberspace its out there FOREVER!

Lasting Impresson

In a time when business is slow and management is struggling to come up with different ways of stimulating revenue, I bore witness recently to a major reason why I believe y'all are floundering.

I was called to our Canmore office to do a single rental and since it means time away from our desk in Banff, I agreed to do it. The rental went smoothly enough and another satisfied customer drove off in one of our vehicles. I then started to close down the shop and warm up a vehicle for the fifteen minute drive back to Banff.

As I fired up the GMC Acadia and was clearing snow off the back window, a Japanese lady walked over to me from her van. In broken English she tried to explain to me that it was not starting. Knowing that she was a guest of the hotel where our location was, I thought to simply refer her to the front desk. But my SUV was still warming up so I figured it wouldn't hurt to have a look.

With a simple twist of the keys I knew that I was dealing with a weak battery. And as I turned to inform the lady I caught a glimpse of three child seats strapped to the middle row of seats in the back of the van. From those three child seats, three pairs of eyes staired back at me: three pairs of eyes that belonged to three little kids. They had been sitting in a cold van and with the doors now open it was only getting colder.

She needed a boost and thankfully she had a basic pair of booster cables in her van. Well I had the mighty Acadia on hand so I figured I'd simply give her a jump start and be on my way. At this point I noted a group of hotel staff linning up for their smoke break a few feet away from us. I also noted that none of them were bothering to offer assistance to me or the lady who was standing closer to them.

The van "jumped" nicely after a quick boost and I advised the lady to let her van run for a few minutes before attempting to drive off. As I walked back to the Acadia two of the smoking staff members walked over to me and made some comments regarding what they had witnessed...

"One thing about North American vehicles is they always start in the winter."

"Yeah that battery is dead."

"You sure she can drive? Looks like she stalled again."

Not once was there an inquiry of the lady's well being or an expression of care concerning it. I couldn't help but think that this was their guest and not even an existing or potential client of mine. Not once had they done anything of their own to resolve the situation. I looked over where the van and moved and sure enough she had stalled. I figured it was because she decided to drive off so soon. I ran over to her window and she looked up at me with a bewildered, frustrated, and defeated look on her face.

"I can boost it again but maybe you should let it run for a bit. " I said. "Where do you live?"

"A little bit away from Canmore."

"Good. Let me help you take the kids inside because it is cold."

"I can call my husband."

"Yes do that."

"But he is working today I don't think he can leave. He is working in Banff!"

"Thats ok we will boost your van and I can follow you home!'

"Oh thank you!!"

We got the kids out and she was able to go inside with them to make her call. I got the van boosted and moved it to a safe area (it had stalled just before entering the main road). I ran back inside to see if she was able to to make her call. She had. I ran back outside to see if the van was still running.

And there they were watching me the whole time. None of them even offering to help with the kids. And then...

"Hey there is flat tire on one of your cars."

I hadn't noticed. It was fine when I had checked it in a few days ago.

"You need to move it. Creates the wrong impression of our hotel."

White hot anger boiled inside of me. I stared him down. I kept my silence. He lowered his eyes.

20 minutes later I helped the lady and her kids back into her van. I followed her home. She did live a bit outside of town but I informed our office in Banff that I would be a bit late and why.

When she pulled into her driveway she jumped out of the van and with tears in her eyes she ran over to my driver side window. She then proceeded to thank me profusely by bowing low. I told her that she needed a new battery but if she needed a vehicle right away she could call us and I would find something for her. I drove off without even leaving her my number. Our business was in the phone book.

Out of spite, I waited to put the spare on our car and move it till the next day. I am sure the "impression" that the hotel was hoping to preserve remained intact.

It certainly is staying with me.

WE + 1

My wife is soundly sleeping in our bed this morning and I have snuck down to the living room to review the Lesson Study for today and fire off one of these blog entries. Writing is one of my therapies and I've been neglecting this blog for while. So much has happened in the past week or so. For one, we have been experiencing extreme weather out here in the Canadian Rockies. And for another, the news of WE + 1 has definitely began to reshape our lives in dramatic but amazing ways. [ see below: How we celebrated the news!]

I for one wanted to keep the news under wraps for a while. To me this was a family matter and hence a private thing. We also are still in a very delicate part of the pregnancy, and while we have faith that says when God gives us a gift He will sustain it, God only knows the ultimate breath and scope of His plan. But alas the news got leaked and found ourselves being showered with much appreciated congrats from all over. Ah the power of Facebook! Might as well embrace it for it is here to stay.

Speaking of Facebook, I posted something a few days ago which I still feel holds true to how I am truly starting to look at things in all aspects of my life...

Something kicks in when you realize you are going to be Dad.
Suddenly half-hearted efforts really annoy you.
This sh*t is serious boys and girls.
I am through joking around.

I see it now more than ever especially in how I approach my job. If this is how I am going to provide for my family, at least for the next little bit, then I want there to be no question as to my ability, work ethic, and commitment to be better every day as well as being excellent in the moment. And yes, I do find it particularly annoying when people do a lot of talking and yet cannot back up what they say with actions. Just shut up and impress me with your actions!

I have more comments on issues on all levels that have occurred in the past few weeks but I will continue in future blogs. Suffice it to say for now that I cannot change people but I sure can control my reaction to what they bring to the table.

Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the realization that there is something more important beyond it.

My Father's Birthday.

As I gave both my parents a hug this afternoon and waved to them as they drove off to Calgary, I felt a wave of nostalgia which heightened later when Tess visited some of her friends and I opted to stay home to take a nap. I miss them. This is a good thing.

Tomorrow is my Dad's 65th birthday and as I looked at him and observe his interactions with friends, my wife, and my mom... I am grateful to God that he is still healthy, strong, and filled with vitality. Even in retirement he is willing to throw in a helping hand, an ecouraging word, but also crack a joke here and there. I understand now where my younger sister's wit comes from. I recognize my older sister's work ethic. My siblings and I are made from the same ingredients... just mixed in different concentrations.

The picture above is particularly touching. My mom suggested it. My Dad agreed. I think they are happy because the bike is a symbol of me taking my health seriously once again. The picture is touching to me because my parents gave me my first serious bike back when I was about 15 years old.

The thing that I love about my father is that he has allowed me to see his human side. I have been witness to his struggles. But he has also shown me what it is to rise above and that this is only possible through a trusting relationship with God. For doubters (of which I have been one many a time) I present him: a person who not only preaches salvation, but has lived it.

Ride on Homies...

So now that Alberto Contador stands accused of doping more and more people are giving up on the sport of cycling. Frankly I don't blame them. I too find it disheartenning when one by one the elite of cycling continue to stain the sport with their actions. It makes one wonder how much of the spectacle that is the peleton in full flight is "real". Alberto is now threatening to retire from the sport. Maybe it is just as well.

This does not change my love of the sport - I who never made it past the grassroots level. There is something pure about clipping into your pedals on cool fall morning, heading out onto the road, and establishing a brisk pace as the kms roll away. I fell in love when I was 15 and even though there have been extended periods when I have not ridden, I have always come back.

I am grateful for all the support I have recieved on Facebook for my awkward re-entry into riding. But probably the one that means the most is the support from my "old" friend Mark Aguila whom I have known since my pre-teen years. It was Mark's and his brother Shem's influence that got me into riding back in the day. However it was Mark who joined me on my last official ride in California back in the fall of 1990. It was a short trek through the grapevines of Clovis and it is one of my most cherished childhood memories.

Now I love my bike but Mark recently picked up a beautiful GT Carbon racer complete with Zipp wheels (he paid an incredable price for them Good goin' bro!) that totally blew me away when he first posted pictures up of it. [see below]

No matter what the results are in the cases against Alberto Contador and even Lance Armstrong, the sport lives on. Those of us who ride know that it was the magic of discovering that we could pretty much go anywhere on just two wheels that got us started and it is what lies beyond the horizon that keeps us going.

Ride on my homies!

Turning Thanksgiving into Thanksliving...

It is that time of year when Canadians take a moment to think about what they are grateful for. I am proud of my adopted homeland. As I look back on this year, I find myself thinking that I have indeed been blessed in so many ways. But what follows are things that I am most thankful for.

My Wife

It pains me to see her work so hard so that she can take care of her family in the Phillippines. It saddens me when I seen how some of them appear to not even be grateful for her hard efforts. Canada isn't the Promise Land. You have to work very hard here to make it.

When I see her fall into bed beside me after giving the day her all, I can only hope that one day we will be in a position where she will not have to work so hard or at all. She takes good care of me in her own way and although sometimes I am blind to see how but I get it more and more each day.

My Siblings

Along with my parents, they are part of the few constant things in my life. I hate that we are so far apart from each other these days but I am grateful for generious Wireless Plans and Facebook that keep us connected. I want nothing but good things for them and I pray they continue down the road to thriving and prospering.

My Parents

As I get older and hopefully wiser, I can see that I have been truly blessed to have these dear people as my parents. I realize with passing day what they tried to give me and how much they sacrificed to do so. I can only hope that one day soon I can show them hat I am grateful and that their efforts were not in vain.

Friends

They are few and far between these days. My life has often ripped them from me and so I have gotten used to simply cutting them off. I prefer a private life. But those who have shown me kindness, treated me with disgression, and continued to encourage me are appreciated more than they know. God's greatest blessing.

This Thanksgiving will be simple and quiet. In these still moments, I thank God that I have been sustained, preserved, and blessed in ways that humble and awe me. I pray the same happens to all who read this. Take a moment to see that it is already happening to you.

Giant Defy 1: FlightDeck Complete

I stopped by the store where I picked up my bike and inquired about the prices on cycling computers. The owner pointed me to a display where a few units were sitting and I noted that the packaging on them looked a bit weathered. That was a turn off for me. I wanted something that felt new. When I looked at the prices I was furthered turned off.

$179.99!

Yeah the computer was function filled but it looked cheaply made and I was guessing the price had more to do with the fact that the Giant label was stamped on it rather than inherent build quality. If this is what these guys were charging for a cycling computer I wondered what kind of crazy prices they would charge for entry level clipless pedals or shoes. I excused myself quite rapidly.

Later in the early evening I made my way to Canmore and ended up at the Sports Experts. To my delight they had an end of season cycling equipment sale and I picked up an Wireless Cateye Vectra for off 25% the already low low low price. I think I even paid less forit than I did for the Wired Velo 5 model I mounted on my Specialized back in 2006. (Yay the march of progress!) It pretty much has the same functions of the computer I had back then, (Current Speed, Max Speed, Odometer, Current Trip, and Time) but all the data is transmitted through a wireless senor mounted on the fork of my bike.

I am very happy that my FlightDeck is complete and I already enjoy the view from the controls. I may have to wait a bit to do the next big step in getting this rig up to spec (proper clipless pedals and shoes). But it is now is ready to record my adventures and keep track of those pound losing km's that I intend to put on my steed.

This Thing.

No it isn't brand new. That is a fact that should be cleared up because the pictures I posted on Facebook are misleading in that it does look mint on the digital screen. It isn't fully carbon. The fork is and the rest is hydroformed aluminium.

It is is fast. With barely any human effort I guided it on a test run here in Banff and my breath was literally taken away at how quick and nimble it was. The mid range Shimano components performed in unison and I clicked relatively effortlessy through the gears.

I had stopped at the local bike store this past week because rumour had it that they were getting rid of their stock in preparation for winter when they transform into one of the key providers of ski equipment for the region. As I look at their offerings from Norco, Cannondale, and Giant, I was impressed with the pricing but my heart sank a bit because they were still no where close to what I could afford at the moment.

But when I went up the steps to the second level of the store, my eye caught a row of red Giant Defy 1s hanging on the far wall. They were retired rental units and they were for sale. I looked over all of them a little closely and other then some minor blemishing they were pretty mint. The price tags were very encouraging.

When my bike was stolen in Toronto in the fall of 2007 it left a hole in my life. Those of you who ride and are passionate about the sport know what I am talking about. No one messes with your rig. Whenever I think of that night I still feel this wrenching feeling in my gutt. There was a lot of negative going on in my life and my bike had been my one joy and solace. To have it taken away from me at that point was like stabbing me in the heart. Call this being overly dramatic if you will but that is truly what it felt like.


A few years have passed and life has moved on. I have taken new responsibilities. There are bills to be paid. I am not just thinking for me now. I have a wife. She wants a family soon. And with all this there are the uncertainties about whether or not I could get back into riding and bring myself to the level I was a few years ago...

But as I wheeled the bike back into the store and Tess asked me if I was going to get it I knew that I really wanted to try. It was exactly what I needed in bike. It was performance oriented but not so blatantly so. While not cheap it was well below what even cyclist would pay for a day to day rig.

I am no pro rider. Hell, I am not even that skinny kid who begged for his first bike and didn't quite believe dreams came true until his parents surprised him with with fulfilling one. I am no where close to being fit (although my body responds to cycling and I foresee a positive physical change coming. Yay!)

What I am is a guy who is one huge step closer to righting the great wrong and a guy who never lost the love of this very special, simple, and pure thing.

The ER Saga Conclusion...

I love my wife.

If there is one thing that I got from this experience it is that statement is true on even a deeper level. They say that it is the challenges that are brought a marriage that either destroy it or serve as mortar and brick to used to build it up. I know that for me the latter has been proven to be true.

I hope, Lord willing, I never put my wife in the position she was in on Wednesday. Through the help of good friends we made it to the ER and she put a brave face throughout. But as I lay on the gurney within the relative safety of the hospital she lay her head on my chest and I could feel her shiver as she quietly sobbed. I know it will be a moment and image I will have in my heart for a very long time.

The Lord is good. He has sustained us. Once again understand that He does not remove the challenge but He gives you the tools and the means to make it through to the other side. In my wife's life I can see concrete evidence that He has consistently awarded her faith in Him. It is crazy how many of her direct prayers have been answered.

And to those friends and family who offered their prayers, words of encouragment, visited, and did so much to help us through this: we appreciate you! We honour you! We love you!

The Saga Continues!

The ER Saga Chapter 2

On the Wednesday morning Tess was able to use the washroom and leave a signficant deposit. While this too has been known to cause stress to the digestive system, it was a good sign that things were getting better. I made the decision to go into work with the knowledge that my immediate supervisor had given me permission to take Tess in for her ultrasound when it came time for her appointment. What I didn't realize was that I left without eating any sort of breakfast. This would prove to be a fateful decision.

I started feeling weak when my supervisor was driving me back to Canmore where was I stationed for the day after a run of a car back to Banff earlier (we run a really tight fleet out here). I recognized the first signs of *bonking and I knew I needed to eat something sugary or drink something with sugar to jumpstart my motor. I kicked myself in the ass metaphorically because I had neglected to eat earlier.

Things appeared to settle down after I drank a little and bit into a candy bar. But as I drove back to get Tess for her appointment I started to get a headache at the base of my neck and vertigo kicked in. I forced myself to concentrate as best I could and somehow made it to the front door of our condo and flopped onto our living room couch.

"I feel dizzy"

Those were the only words I told Tess. She describes my appearance as being very pale and she could feel my pulse quickening. I had never *bonked this hard before. The vertigo finally got to me and I vomited all I had ingested earlier into the kitchen sink.

Tess made several phone calls to her friends and fortunantly Kuya Romeo was able to drive me to the Banff Mineral Springs Hospital where I was checked into the ER. I was suited up in a hospital gown and lay on a gurney with my wife beside me holding my hand. The irony being that her stomach ache had dissipated and it was now me who appeared to be in need of medical attention.

I was extremely frustrated with the situation and I knew that this was putting an untold amount of stress on Tess. The last thing I wanted to do. As I lay there I determined that this would never happen again and whatever it was I would fight it. I don't know how powerful mind is over matter but as soon as I thought those thoughts and prayed my symptons started to dissipate.

In fact when the doctor finally came in to see me and conducted her checkup she said I was in good health and was willing to send me home for bed rest after half an hour more of observation. During that time period Ate Lynn came to visit and both she and Tess when out to hunt me up some food. I ate. I felt all the more better.

We walked home...

*Bonking or otherwise known as "hitting the wall" is a reference derived from endurance sports most notably cycling. This condition occurs when stores of glycogen in the liver and muscles have been depleted. The indivdual suffering from this well experience an extreme loss of energy, sharp fatigue, and often vertigo. Slight cases can be remedied through ingesting food or drink containing carbohydrates.

The ER Saga Chapter 1

Here we are celebrating Daiki's Birthday Party the evening of which Tess started to fill a dull pain in her tummy. She thought it was because she ate too much...

At approximately 9 pm on Monday night I found myself rushing Tess to the ER at the Banff Mineral Springs because she was experiencing severe abdominal pains on her left side. Test were conducted on her urine, blood, and an X-ray was taken of the affected area. She was given medication for the pain and put on IV.

The X-ray revealed a build up occuring in her large intestine which was assumed to the primary cause of her pain. However traces of blood in her urine led to concerns that she may have other more serious medical issues based on a history of Kidney issues. We were told that an ultrasound had been scheduled for Tuesday at Hospital in Canmore and she was released to come home.

Much to our frustration we find out in the morning that we had been given false information and the ultrasound had actually been scheduled for the next day. But I had already signed off on the day from work so we decided to stay in and rest. This proved very difficult to do because Tess was still in much pain even though she had taken medication for it and she was still constipated.

I was so focused on my wife's well-being that I had not taken stock of where I was physically. This would come into play in Wednesday events...

Musings @ The End...

The 2010 Tour De France is in the history books and I am sure the wheels are turning already in preparation for next years epic race. I think this year will be known for 2 things. 1. The final bookend on the cycling career of one Lance Armstrong. 2. The argument over Alberto Contador's reaction to Andy Schleck's chain mishap.



Lance Armstrong came to prominance during a time when we here in North America needed a solid sports figure who could recapture our imagination much like Michael Jordan did. (Jordan won his last title in 1998. Armstrong won his first Tour in 1999.) For seven straight years there after Armstrong would wear yellow in Paris and we had new hero.

Now as his professional career fades into the setting sun the questioning has become more intense. Did he win those races legitmately? Were they a product of the many innovations that he and his support staff brought to the sport of cycling? (A team designed to give all for one single effort. Trek rising to dominance in the industry.) Were they a product of simply putting in the time, effort, and sacrifice? Did surviving cancer give him that 3 percent edge over his rivals?

I believe the next few month will reveal much and I am prepared either way. 8 Tours is a long time. I've grown up in the 10 years between his first and last tour. I have learned much about the flaws of human nature and should one of my heroes fall, I'm prepared to digest the lessons one can learn from that transition.

And as far as the chain incident...

Very interesting how a single reaction can taint a rider's reputation but in this case I think the negative opinions Contador has garnered are somewhat deserved. He could have waited or had he honestly not noticed Schleck's chain problems when they occured, he could have taken his pace back a few notches.

I've seen a lot of commentary asking what the big deal was. After all, In other forms of racing taking advantage of a fellow racers misfortune is how races are won. Not so in cycling especially in the race that defines cycling: the Tour de France. There is etiquette that demands in this race respect of fellow racers in these situations especially when it comes to the Yellow Jersey rider. It is when Lance, known for being brash and disrespectful for most of his early career, began to demonstrate that he respected this code, that he began to win over people in the European cycling community. Alberto, brilliant over the past 3 years, may have lost admirers in both fans and the peleton. You need friends in the latter to survive in a race!

I dare say the stage has been set for next year's Tour. I hope both these guys go home and bring their A game the next time around. I hope a fire has been lit in Andy's heart by his performance this year and makes it his goal to beat Alberto. I hope Alberto realizes that he needs to be on top of his game to maintain his throne in the coming year.

At any rate there are 2 solid winners of this year's Tour: 1. The Fans. 2. Specialized bikes!

In All Honesty...

I've been told time and time again that I live in one of the most beautiful places on earth. And there are times when I wake up on a clear and sunny day here in Banff, and I look outside our living room window at Cascade Mountain and my breath is taken away. For the most part what has been said is true.

But even here, amidst the beauty of the Canadian Rockies, I can feel that things are temporary. There is a sense of restlessness that I feel from everyone I come into contact with including members of my family and friends. I guess we're all struggling for things... I just hope they are the right ones.

I know what I want and in a sense it is simple. I want stability. I dream of a day when my wife and I can sit in our living room and simply secure and content that things are good. I don't limit this dream to myself because I wish it for each member of my family. My sisters. My parents. I really wish that we all could be in a good place. In fact I wish that we could all be close together and truly be able to be there for each other while respecting that we all have our own lives.

I am busy these days simply maintaining the status quo. (Who knew it would feel like a battle every day!) But behind the routine and grind, my mind has been working over time thinking of what I can do to help take us there. As a believer that we live in the final stages of this journey, I know that there is a big possiblity that it is our lot to struggle for the rest of our sojourn here. But what if we're just told to work a little harder, love a little truer, and just put in more time so things get better?

I get it now. I really wish I did back then so I could have made wiser decisions, focused on the things that mattered, and fought a little harder. I realized now that I had all the proper tools. You don't have to be a genius to make it, you just needed to understand the fundamentals, and simply go out there and put in the effort. You need to work when most people call it a day and wake up a little earlier than the rest.

I've discovered that doesn't mean you'll always get the credit for your effort. At times it may seem that people that half ass it and just know how to talk a good game - make it. But this is about living with myself at the end of day and laying my head down on my pillow knowing that I did all I could to move myself and my family closer to our dream. And the good Lord does have some profound words to say in the Good Book about being diligent in all things...

Not a guru or anything like that... Not anything new or profound... Just putting out some personal truth.

So I have the tools. I have the motivation. I just need some insight into my vision. I believe you need to have a vision. A vision of where to go and how to get there. On this I am still unclear. I still stand at the crossroads and yet I know that I have to make a decision soon. The worst thing that can happen is to let your life run away from you when you could have clearly taken some precise steps in handling it. If you've found your vision... ACT UPON IT!

This is not to say that the past few years have been wasted. I would have to say that the last 5 years have been my greatest education. Without them I would not possess the insight I now have. But insight not acted upon rots.

I've rambled a bit with this one. But if you've stuck with me I hope you gain something from it. Anyway this is my mind right now. In all honesty...

1 Year Down, 100 More To Go...

I have been in the classroom of love for the past year and have learned much from marriage who has been my constant teacher.

1 year ago I took one of the biggest steps of my life and signed on to be my wife's partner for life. At that point I knew this was something very important and I tried to peer through the looking glass of past experiences and choose key markers to help me in the days to follow. Some of that helped but I must testify that there is still a large learning curve involved and sometimes all you have to guide you is your heart.

One thing I learned very early on is that this same heart needed to grow. No longer were my hopes, cares, and dreams my own but they now needed to include hers. I could no longer simply want things for myself but had to take into consideration what would make her happy too. Sometimes things that hold little value with me, mean all the world to her.

"But shouldn't you have known this before hand?"

Yes. But like faith and other spiritual matters, everything is a theory until you are called to practice it in the pinch. This past year has planted me in the arena and the starving lion on the other hand is drooling for his lunch. The first piercing truth is: in order to survive, one must fight. The second truth is: if you take a closer look, that hungry lion is a spitting image of you. Sometimes the biggest obstacle in your way to success in anything is your own pride and selfishness.

A few weeks ago I was able to take a break from work and eat lunch at home at the same time as my wife. We rushed through our meal and I was able to drive her back to work. We kissed goodbye and I drove slowly away. As I looked back to see her one last time I was surprised by what I saw. There was my wife running beside the car, her hair flying in the wind, a smile radiating from her face, her eyes dancing, and then she blew me one last kiss.

Whenever I find myself in that arena, facing the lion that even now begins to walk slowly towards me in anticipation of an end to things, I reflect back on my wife running beside my car. In that moment I see every reason why I am with her. In that moment I see every reason for me to stay. In that moment I see every reason to keep fighting.

For in that moment I see the honest and unmistakable love that my wife has for me.

I hope as one year closes and another begins, I continue to keep this image fresh in my mind. I hope that even with all the things that distract from within and without I continue to see her as being this. And most importantly... I hope that I am able to return the love she gives me in ways that she will truly feel that she is loved, protected, and cared for.



I love you darling ko! Happy Anniversary!

"Blood on the Dance Floor"

I do not do many birthday greetings on Facebook anymore. I guess I am just lazy. But after reading Lily's note on her dear friend Maj I got to thinking and the following is what I came up with:

I have a few images of Maj etched into my mind but the one that stands out to me is the scene we filmed at the graveyard for The Prodigal. I was a little worried because in order for the scene to really work Maj had to carry it. If he couldn't deliver, the scene would fall flat, and the central theme of our story would fail to be portrayed with authenticity.

I need not have worried because when the camera started rolling and Maj... (very much in character) stumbled through the rows of tombstones towards the one over his mother grave He knelt to grasp it and hug it as if by doing so he could feel her touch. The camera captured it all. The dam broke and he unleashed a wave of raw pathos into the dreary afternoon. Here was man who had suffered a great loss at a very early age and though time had passsed, the wound just would not heal.

Even the presence of his brother, (played by Addison ) who reached out with genuine concern, was of no comfort. In fact the intrusion of Addison 's character furthered the developing rift between them. That moment is captured here:

Thank you Maj for leaving your "blood on the dance floor". Your efforts help make the production of The Prodigal a success. When I reviewed the footage soon after we filmed it, I knew we had something very special and it really motivated me to see the project through.

Sometimes we may not fully understand why we have been given certain gifts instead of others. However the one thing we can be sure of is God expects us to develop them and use them.

Never back down friend. I miss you. I am proud of you. You are in my thoughts and prayers!

"No Fighting."

First, I just want to thank everyone who expressed concern for my Dad's well-being during his recent visit to the ER. Thankfully everything checks out and the doctors gave him a clean bill of health. He is still planning to visit Alberta this for a bit and I look forward to seeing him here.

It is at times like these that I have glad that my father made the decision to retire. To understand the impact of his choice you have to know the kind of person my father is. He is the type of individual who firmly believes in going above and beyond what is expected of him. He was (and still is) willing to take on the challenges that most people would shy away from and thereby represent the principles and institutions that he cherishes deeply.

It was not an easy decision to step of the field. But he did and while many factors played into that choice, his health was significant one. My only wish now is that those of us around him will respect his choice and allow my father to rest. He has earned it.

On another but related note...

Our house is a little emptier now with the recent departure of our housemate Yuya. He will truly be missed for his kindness, generosity, spirit, and friendship. I wish this bright young man well and I believe he truly has an amazing future ahead of him.



At his goodbye party that was held the main park in downtown area of Banff, Yuya was asked to say a few words to all his guest (mostly his co-workers). He hopped onto the bench of the picnic table where all the food for his party was and looked out onto the crowd. I don't know remember exactly what his first words were... he spoke in broken phrases underplayed by his Japanese accent... something about loving everyone there and wishing them well. But then he said...

"No fighting."

Everyone laughed at this but the weight of his words really caused me to pause and reflect. I looked around me and I noted that this large group of people, who would have never spent time with each other otherwise, was united because of this young man who didn't even speak perfect English. This made me a bit sad.

One of the things that I looked forward to when marrying a Filipina was having a chance to reconnect with my birth culture. I am very proud of my 3rd culture status (neither Filipino nor Canadian but an amalgamation of both) because I believe it grants me a special insight and perspective into dialogue across cultural lines. But I had often worried how my kids would fair as they are even further from both even in a country like Canada that believes in a mosaic of peoples that celebrate their roots.

I would want my children to see the beauty of my birth culture. I would want them to see the value of family as intepreted by Filipino's (diehard loyalty and faithfulness). I would want them to see the tenacity of a people who have been through so much in their history and how they still choose to see the joy in life and fill in it with laughter every chance they get.

But I also want them to be aware of the negatives. That very same tenacity, hardworking attitude, and will to survive often causes Filipinos to turn on each other. I find it very sad that those who know what it is like to come here and fight to gain a foothold in this country (and finally do a la landed immigrant status) can so easily turn on others who are even newer (a la those who only have a working permit) and see them as a lower and treat them as such. I say this as a naturalized Canadian who has been witness to the process. I can tell you that being Canadian does not make me any better than anyone else. If anything it grants me the ability to serve in a greater capacity rather than to be served.

"No fighting"

Yuya had it right. It grows harder, especially within today's world economy, to grasp the dream of becoming established in this country. More and more people are being denied status for one reason or another. The truth is that only together and united can people have a chance.

I know there is much I still need to learn and much of the issue is not even racial. We are all bound by the human condition. But I simply hope that some of these words will cause people to think and by thinking find the motivation to be a tool of self-less servitude to their fellow-men.


Be the change that you want to see in the world -

The Open Road Calls....

So I was able to sneak away to one of the two prominent bike stores in Canmore this week and check out some Trek and Giant road bikes. I love it when a salesperson truly seems to appear to love his/her job and the guy at Rebound Cycle (and I can't seem to remember his name) was all about the bike.

Of course in one corner of the room stood the mighty Madone all done up in Team Astana colours from the 2009 race seasons and supposedly it was one of Lance Amrstrong's machines. An autographed replica Tour De France yellow jersey was folded neatly in a picture frame sitting at the base the bike display. All very impressive but the Madone was way out of my league both in price and experience level. (I am no pro-racer).



The salesperson steered me to where a couple of Trek 2 series bikes where hanging and with one hand pulled a 2.1 off the wall and held it out at arms length. I was again impressed. This was an aluminum bike and all I've been hearing about lately is carbon carbon carbon...



He pointed out how the shaping of tubes, which truly resembled a lot of carbon layups that I have seen, was done through hydro forming (high pressure water stuff) and then he challenged me to distinguish it from a carbon racer even with weight. Having recently tested a Giant Defy Advance machine that was made out of carbon fibre I was hard pressed to feel the difference in weight and stiffness. The only thing that gave it away was the badging on the down tube that gave the fact away that this was aluminum.

"So what you have here for $1000 less then most carbon entry level bikes and thousands less then some elite machines is a perfectly capable and competitive bike. In fact if you place in beside the Madone you'll see that it has the same race geometry. It is the same bike just built in a different medium"

He handed me the machine and I set it down on the floor of the shop and ran my hand over the shiny paint

"You wanna take it out for a ride?"

5 minutes later I was spinning out of the parking lot and onto a side street. I clicked into the pedals, shifted through the gears, and in no time I was at speed. The 2.1 begs to be pushed and I could feel the smooth transfer of power from my legs to the back wheel. Things of mechanical beauty are where art, engineering, and effort are united in a singular experience... such is the 2.1.

20 years have passed since the last time I swung my leg over a true racer and experienced the thrill that has been a personal addiction ever since. Some may note that if one was to sum up the time that I actually owned and rode a bike, (including era 1 where I had my road racer and era 2 when I had my urban commuter) the span would only be about 4 years. So in reality I spent a relatively short time in the saddle and still consider myself very much a novice.

As I returned the 2.1. to the shop and thanked the salesperson for his service, I realized that even though I loved the machine, it wasn't really what I was looking for in a bike. When I owned my Specialized Sirrus the bike served as more than just a recreational vehicle, it was my main mode of transport for nearly 2 years. Once I had it in full Thomson gear, it was a bad ass urban street fighter that could take the beating of riding through the streets of downtown Toronto.

Only one other machine could come close to replacing my steed and that would be the 2010 Cannondale Bad Boy Disc. Other than slapping on some Shimano 520 SPD pedals, a centre mount cycling computer, and maybe a bottle cage or two, this bike was setup exactly how I would my former Sirrus. In fact I might even consider getting the 26' model because I could easily switch out slicks for knobbies and have a competent trail bike as well... (I am not sure they sell 26' on North American soil...).

I know Bad Boys (and yes that is really what it is called) are hard to find so I did some calling around and apparently the only shop who is willing to order one in is a bike store based out of Edmonton. But the price they quoted me was well under the price of the Trek and definitely a huge drop from the Giant. With some disciplined financial planning, this guy could be mine...

When I shared a bit of how I lost my Sirrus online, my old friend Mark Aguila, the last guy to go with me on an extended bike ride during my last days in California, related to me that he understood my pain and also the bond a man can have with a machine. How appropriate for him to be the one to share this thought because it was while riding with him and his brother Shem that I developed the love for riding during those long ago days in Clovis and Fresno.

A bond was servered and I have felt the loss ever since. It is wrong that has nagged me for the past 3 years and I think I have never let go. I need to set it right. It might seem crazy to some but it is the only thing I truly want that is material at this point in my life.

You riders understand...

Your Love is Amazing... Steady and Unchanging...

I just viewed about 2 minutes of a video posted on youtube where a gentleman was reading a letter he had written to one of my Facebook friends confessing his feelings for her. I didn't complete my viewing of the video so this isn't some play by play analysis but rather a reflection on the thoughts it initally triggered.

I think it is safe to say that we've all done our fair share to in the least breath the same air as the one we were attracted too and at the most try some thing creative to express how feel for them at one time or another in our lives. Here are my top five with 5 being the least and going all the way to number 1.

My Top Five

5. So everyone knows that the end of the school year, especially in highschool, is a sentimental time and this best known for the signing of yearbooks and such. I think it was my Freshmen year at FAA (Fresno Adventist Academy) and I had been majorly crushing on a girl ever since the 8th grade (I know a year back but a lifetime at that age.) Well there she was watching seniors graduate in a very flattering gray dress and me with a camera. I mustered the courage to ask her let me take a picture of her. To my surprise she said yes. I still have that picture somewhere in the basement of my parents house tucked away into an album.

4. During the latter part of my highschool years and into my early college years I had a "step" hair cut like most asian boys. You all know what I am talking about: long on top and shaved close on the bottom. My room mate Walter was adept at shaving designs into that short portion of hair especially at the back of my head. He did a beautiful design of a musical note once that got me a lot of attention. Well I had a crush on a girl whose name began with the letter "I" and I had him shave it on the back of my head. Needless to say it embarrassed her but she still went with me to the Valentine's Day Banquet... Of course we never spoke again afterward...

3. Everyone knows that one of the "safest" ways to express your affections for someone is through a hand written note (yes even with the existence of email!) I guess safe being you don't have to see the persons reaction in person when they read the contents of your note. I remember falling for a friend of mine throught the conversations we had that lasted into the wee hours of the morning but feeling that she was completely out of my league I didn't know if I dare confess to her how I felt. I figured I would write it all out in a note because I felt I expressed myself better on paper. I caught her as she was walking from the girls dorm and gingerly gave her the note... End result? I got the girl I didn't believe I could have...

2. During my last few years in Toronto, I commuted via my performance urban bike which I loved even more than my car. I had just gotten it and was talking to my girlfriend who lived about 65 km awayon the phone. She seemed like she was feeling down and needed some cheering up because she was stuck doing something she didn't want to do for the day. I got off the phone and looked at my bike. A few minutes later I was heading out on one of the busiest avenues in Toronto with a sentimental card tucked into my waterproof backpack... After battling winds, cars, and even rain I had made it to my girlfriends front door and tucked the card into the mail slot. I turned around had headed back home. In all I rode about 200 km that day. But it was all worth it when I heard her smile on the phone that evening.

1. My new girlfriend and I had just started dating and I was living in Red Deer, Alberta and she was living in Banff about a 3 hour drive away. I had not told my parents yet for fear that they would disapprove of us getting together so quickly. I usually went to visit her on the weekends but this particular weekend for some reason or another I couldn't make it out to see her. So I was driving home from attending church by myself when my cell phone rang and it was her. She excitedly told me that she was on her way to see me and she would be in town soon. We spent a wonderful afternoon with my my parents where we told them that we were officially together and then she left for Banff late. She had to work the next day as well.

Conclusion

In the grand scheme of things my number 1 isn't something out of the ordinary or particularly creative. In fact it isn't even something I did. It was something Tess did. She went out of her way to show me that she really was interested in being with me. In fact it was something she did to show me that she truly loved me.

I was forever doing things to show the girls that I had fallen for through dramatic gestures that I liked them. There are more I could list but I won't. In end every single one ended up with someone else and I would be left trying to make sense of my loss.

Tess was the one woman who, once she decided that she loved me, gave 110% to our relationship and she hasen't stopped since. One thing I am secure in is that my wife loves me and that is a pretty amazing place to be.

The Daquila's in North America...

I am spending a very quiet evening at home and enjoying it. I haven't had one of these in a while and it is welcome. I do my best recharging in solitude.

I do miss my wife immensely and I am glad that she arrived safely in the Philippines this past weekend. She was able to celebrate her Mom's birthday on the 25th of March and we are indeed grateful that Nanay is doing better. Because of the time change, when Tess goes to bed is when I get up, and this has made a bit difficult to catch each other. However it is during these crossover times that we keep in touch with each other through BlackBerry Messenger. I once again am impressed with this cost saving technology.

I am very happy for my older sister Joy this evening because she was recently hired to a important role with the Amer can Nurses Association (AMA). I am sure that she wants to keep other details of her employment private but let us just say she is finally being paid what I believe she has been worth all along. She has struggled a very long time to get to this place and I believe God has blessed her efforts in a tremendous way.

I think this single event gave a shot of motivation to my family that we all needed. I know there has been a cloud of uncertainty and doubt that has hung over us for a while now and we really needed to believe in God and ourselves again. Nothing cripples oneself more than self doubt and we had a bit of that flowing for a bit.

However after hearing Joy's news my sister Lily Msg'ed me, "boy that gives me hope!" I had to concur.

More than ever I believe that our family can be in a better place. Like Joy, I can see Lily being paid what she is truly worth, and doing something she is good at. I believe in her talent and abilty to teach and I believe young minds will be molded for good under her direction. Just hang in there sibling! Things will happen in their proper time!

Like my father I believe that things are drawing to a close here on earth faster than we might be willing to accept. But my father also believes that we need to be stewards of the time and resources that we have while we are here. I want to follow that example more than ever.

Without fully disclosing my plans... Lets just say I derive great motivation from my older sister who earned her Master's Degree inspite of the challenge of being a new mom and dealing with other personal matters. She gritted her teeth and got the job done. The same can be said of the younger one Lily. The same blood that flows through their veins is in mine and it is time to see how strong that flow is. A lot of the lessons that have been learned over the past 10 years need to be applied now.

So I pray for my family tonight. I pray for my wife that she continues to be a blessing to her family in the homeland and that the Lord bless us so that she can continue to do so. I pray for my sisters that they keep the faith and keep fighting. I pray for my Dad that God continue to filll his life with purpose and yet rest at the same time. And finally for my Mom that God give her strength as she holds down the fort in my father's absence.

I love you all!

Of Truth and Printing...

I am up way to early this sabbath morning going over my notes for today's Sabbath School lesson. I will be guiding the discussion today and I want to be sure I cover some key elements. The subject in question is Truth and we will be looking at the role it plays in the Christian life.

The author of the lesson wrote the following, which I find profound:

"We have to be careful, however, with this notion that all religion means is having a relationship with God. Everyone lives in a relationship with God, one way or another. Folks who deny His existence live in a relationship with Him. Even the devil has a relationship with Jesus - he hates Him. The gospel is not a call to have relationship with Jesus but to make a commitment to Him."

While the truth of this statement is not new to me, I love how this is worded. Although I am no theologian, I have grown up in the church and can probably hold my own in a discussion on Christian belief and doctrine. By doing so I guess you could call me religious. And I have shied away from that label.

Instead, for quite a while I have preferred to be called a spiritual person who is interested in spiritual things. I have also stressed that a relationship with God is the most important thing. This is God as a benefactor, mentor, counselor and friend. But the idea of commitment takes things to a whole new level of meaning for me.

Commitment is defined in one way as steadfastness despite arduous circumstances. It means that, though the sky is falling, you will endeavour to be there in whatever capacity you can be. In fact, it means that you consistently explore ways of being there in a greater capacity, than you were in the first place, and indeed aim to be at that next level. Not at all dissimilar to falling in love and progressing from being boyfriend (girlfriend) to husband (wife) to father (mother) etc and embracing each stage with all your might... although God still remains your benefactor, mentor, and friend... this progression is characterized by the ultimate realization that He is your Savior and Lord.

Reversing things a bit. Not realizing the keys to commitment is a reason why all relationships fail. Our humanity defeats us. We don't even make it to the "arduous circumstances" bit. We give up way before that and we fail to realize that the reason we don't feel fulfilled and begin looking elsewhere for "the spark and the heat" is because we are not interested in giving this level of "steadfastness" to anyone often, not even ourselves.

Thank God, He loved us before we even loved ourselves. (John 3:16; John 4:19)

Anyway regarding the article I grabbed from CNN and reposted on my Facebook profile which talks about unplugging to enjoy the sabbath: The Sabbath Manifesto. I agree with the sentiment that anything that distracts you from connecting with your fellow human beings and experiencing the sabbath to the fullest should be removed. If this is my beloved BlackBerry, then so be it. I do set it aside for my wife (who ironically grabs my attention by BBm'ing me on hers to come spend time with her!)

But let us remember that technology is largly responsible for why any of us are Christians today. When Gutenberg invented movable type in 1439, the first book to come off the press was the Bible. With that single stroke of genius a new era of the passing of information was introduced. The Word of God was returned to the common man. Our iPhone's and BlackBerrys are direct descendants of this event.

Oh What a Feeling!

The recent onslaught of Toyota commercials on TV are worth commenting on. We all know they are in response to the recent assault on Toyota's reliability based reputation due to issues with their recent product flaws. We all know what they are and why. But having worked for a car rental company that seems to specialize in domestic brand vehicles for a bit now, (I would estimate 89% of our fleet) I think that I can shed some light on the matter.

A large percentage of our rental contracts are made with vehicle replacement customers. These are customers whose personal vehicles are replaced by one of our vehicles because of recalls, scheduled maintenance, and or warranty repairs done by the manufacturer usually at a local dealer. Our vehicle is offered as a courtesy by said dealer. As a rule, the branding of the rental has to match the manufacturer as well as the class of vehicle that the customer owns.

As a point of courtesy I often ask customers what their vehicle is in for and I am often astounded by the issues they have encountered. From malfunctioning computers to burned out pistons, from self firing auto starters to blank GPS screens, from failing wheel ball bearings to random power steering loss and the list continues. However there are two characteristics that all these contracts share 1. A single visit to the dealer is usually not enough to fix the issue (so much so customers are considered regulars). 2. The vehicles in questions are unnervingly new (some well within the first six months after purchase).

So why aren't domestics being pursued and badgered with the same zeal as Toyota is?

I leave it to you.

Tomorrow is another day...

Composed in BlackBerry Document...

My house is alive with laughter, conversation, and the smell of freshly cooked food. This is what Filipinos do: gather together and eat. While I am extremely tired I can appreciate the gesture of my wife's friends rallying around her to give her support.

My mother in-law collapsed on Sunday evening in the Philippines partially due to the extreme heatwave that has hit part of this island country. Like most senior Filipino's Nanay, (translated "Grams") also has high blood pressure. She was taken to the hospital and is fine for now. However the dear old saint is still feeling dizzy and weak.

Tess and I didn't find out till yesterday and my wife took the news hard. In fact, she couldn't sleep well last night and broke down into tears at work. I am glad that she has friends at work who supported her throughout the day and are here now. I am also glad that she is leaving for the homeland this coming Sunday evening as previously planned. I will miss her dearly but is right that she go home so she can be by her Mom's side.

I have been keeping track of my father's trip across Canada and texting him regularly throughout the past two days. While I think I would have done it on my own, he also asked me to do it so I could call my mom (who stayed in Red Deer) with his responses to keep her posted as well on his progress. (It is a pure logistic and fun exercise to decide which communication medium to use to efficiently communicate with each other.)

This morning I knew that he was already in Ontario around Thunder Bay but he did not respond to my text. Later I BBm'd Lily, and she said she hadn't heard from him. I must confess, I had a bit of a panic attack. Coupled with what was going on with my mother in-law, I guess freakin' out was warranted. We tried to keep busy but I know we were both watching the clock getting more uncomfortable with each passing minute. Thankfully we got responses around 1 pm my time and my Dad informed us that he had simply been in a Roger's dead zone. There is still the last leg of his trip and I pray it comes to an uneventful end.

I long for a time when each member of my family will be secure and taken care of. I realize that this is a selfish wish and many will never see the fruition of similar dreams but I still think it is worth striving for. Why not aim for something and try for it? Is this not better than just taking a passive ride through life?

It is getting late. I guess I can wax on more thoughts later. After all...

"Tomorrow is another day..."

Where the Curve and the Bold meet...

Well we are trying to cope with the time change here in Banff and I have to say I'm not to happy about losing an hour of sleep. However I am glad that it occurs on on a Sunday when I get to go into work a little later than on my regular work week.

By God's grace, my sermon was really well received this past sabbath. I was confident that it had been well constructed and met the requirements of "offering instruction, providing encouragement, and inspiring growth". Yes, it looked good on paper, but I knew that actually delivering it on the pulpit was a whole different story. I guess it is very much like being able to play freely on my saxophone at home but choking a bit when I perform onstage if I haven't done it in a while. Adrenalin, your friend if you train it, can be your greatest enemy. These days I am still drained after I preach because of this (explanation for why I tend to become very quiet afterward).

I believe God still fills in the gaps when you commit your message to Him (and yes I call Him "Him". If the Almighty objected to that, I am sure He would have made it known in a concise way by now personally.) He knows when you have sincerely tried and He takes this effort and amplifies it. I hold on to this when a wave of nervousness engulfs me. Only through the Spirit!

Also, one of things I enjoyed this sabbath was chatting with my younger sister Lily via our BlackBerrys. She on her Bold and I on my Curve. We talked for a while via BlackBerry Messenger (BBm) and since it was the weekend, I finally called her for free.

The beginning of this year and the family crises that ensued were a weighted reminder that each member lives so far apart from each other these days. The events that transpired really shook me, and bore in me a determination to shape, as us much as any person can, circumstances so that I can be closer to my siblings and parents. For now it is a piece of technology that connects us, but I hope God allows for more to happen to facilitate this wish.

My wife is leaving for the Philippines this coming weekend to spend much needed time with her family. I will miss her dearly while she is gone. "I've grown accustomed to her face." and indeed "she makes the day begin." The trip will leave a significant dent in our finances but I understand the need to go home. Family is important and aside from God, family is everything.

I know that people have noticed a change in me. I am not so easily available these days to do things (even though I regularly update Facebook and post blogs on here). If you want to know how I'm doing read my stuff... BBm me a message... My pin is on my Facebook profile... Because when I get home all I want is to spend time with my wife and check up on the fam.

My father gave a piece of advise that really rang through to me as he prepared to drive to Ontario this past week (he is now on his way and regularly updates us with his progress via his iPhone). He said that one should sit down and write out on paper what their priorities are. He said in so doing we should focus on what we really value and need with honesty so we can really see what is really needed versus what is simply a want. While he meant this to be study of finances, I think it also applies to life in general. In a world cluttered with distractions, focus is direly needed.

For now I end this with one final reflection:

It takes a strong person to say sorry but and even stronger heart to forgive.

Many people seemed to be preoccupied by the wrongs done to them of late. Whether there is a true foundation for their pain, anger and or frustration is another discussion. But the feelings are real and so I acknowledge them. (Confused? This has everything to do with aspects of my family crises!)

I think we have turned a good sense of justice and a need for fairness into an evil thing especially when it comes to our own personal sense of self-preservation. There is something to be said about following the example that Christ left us. He was quick to forgive, quick to reconcile, and quick to to re-establish. (Read Matthew 18:22 and the story that occurs previous.)

I am no saint. I am done some horrible wrongs in the past and I do still bear the burden of current sins of my own own choice. But God offers a way out and it is through forgiveness.

So I ask for it, by God's grace I grant it, and I hope we all can too...

It is crazy what what we learn along the way. It is even crazier if what we learn is powerful enough to effect change at our very core.

Of Respect and Love...

Respect breeds loyalty,

This sentence, composed of 3 relatively short words, carries with it some profound truth. My Dad shared it with me as we talked on the phone last night (Canada-wide MY5!) He was trying to explain to me the intricacies of effective communcation between the sexes. He and my Mom have been watching a DVD based series on the subject and he was really excited about what he had learned. I was impressed with his brief analysis of the material. While the intention is not to stereotype men and women, because we live in a world where the exception to the rule grows more pervalent every day, the focus of the series was instead to break down some findamental differences and barriers that seperate the sexes.

The series does proclaim that: respect breeds loyalty. But it goes further, it says: loyalty breeds love.

This was illustrated in the training of men and women in the armed forces. One of the key ingredients that leaders of sucessful armies use to mold soldiers is to give them an almost palaitable level of respect. Should a leader be able to impart this sense to their wards, it has been proven that these soldiers are willing to go as far as to die in combat for the love they feel for said leader. Of course many an evil dicatator or world domination bent individual has used this formula in the service of evil. But this only goes to show that the concept works!

How does this transfer to relationships?

The series proclaims that men are built with a need for a respect. Women, on the other hand, are built with a need for love. The way the twain meet is that if a man is shown respect, they will respond with love. If a woman is shown this love, she will in turn show respect. And the cycle continues in a positive sense. The sobering thing is if the cycle is reversed, it continues negatively.

My father and I didn't get much further in the conversation but it was enough to get me thinking about how I fit into this especially in my marriage. I realized that I really hadn't been doing well in some areas of how my wife and I got along. I still have a lot to learn about the Language of Commitment.

"Language of Commitment? Shouldn't it be the Language of Love?"

The Language of Love is easy. When everything is going wonderful, it is easy to spill all the words that warm, comfort, and lead to intimacy. But it is when things are grating, when the gears are not quite meshing, and the tendancy is to look out for one's well-being, that the Language of Commitment comes into play. And believe me it is heaily action based! There needs to be a level of almost superhuman self-control and patience present for the outcome to be positive.

I could go on but I am no expert on these matters for that I look to those who have been married for may years like my parents who are coming up on their 40th Anniversary. But even they disclose that each new day brings its own unique challenges and they are constantly still learning how to successfully be together. And... they acknowledge that if it were not for the mercy and grace of God they would not be.

None of this is easy. But we press on.

As stated when I first started http://www.fromthedeskofromil.blogspot.com/ and http://www.fromthedeskofromil2010.blogspot.com/ these entries often will not be resolved but they serve as markers on a journey. It's crazy what we learn on the way. It's even crazier if what we learn is powerful enough to effect change at our very core.

The Ties that Bind could involve a BlackBerry...

After a few weeks of dead air, I have finally got my blog up and running again. By some fluke I had erased all the graphics on it and while it could have been a simple fix, I was missing my USB drive which had all my graphic software stored on it. (Photoshop CS whatever anyone?) I had loaned the drive to a friend who in turn had graciously loaded coverage of the 2007 Tour De France on it. Viewing about 5 minutes of it last night, I believe it was worth the wait.

Anyway, here we are in March 2010 and I am blown away by how quickly this year is going by. Tess will be leaving for the motherland in less than two weeks and by the time she makes it back into Canada, we'll be hitting the summer season here in Banff/Canmore Alberta. Everyone says that is the busy season and I can see several establishments slowly gearing up for the rush. Being the new kid in town, I'm open to absorbing all I hear and see. As I take stock of where we stand at work, I hope we will be equal to the task although I know we have a learning curve to travel.

I think the big news of the past week has been my new BlackBerry Curve 8520 Smartphone. I have Lily to thank for getting me to sign up at Rogers for this smartphone. While I took my Dad's iPhone for a serious test drive and loved how it works, I knew that the key ingredient that I was looking for on a new phone was the ability to communicate freely with members of my immediate family as well as co-workers. In short, the BlackBerry Messenger application (BBm) is what sold me. Essentially, anyone with a BlackBerry can invite other owners via their individual pins to use this application to carry on a chat style conversation, free of charge, anywhere in North America. This is great because I get to have a day long conversation with my wife, Lily, my work manager Amanda, and others in the BB community without having to worry about data transfer costs. And of course I can still email or text my Dad and Joy (both iPhone users) since I can access those avenues on this smartphone as well.

With my family being in a tight transition period right now, communcation between all the members is crucial to me. I have observed that in the past we don't do well when we aren't talking to each other. Bad things happen. I'll leave it at that.

Yes we are in transition. Tess has her struggles and I applaud each step she takes to resolve them. Dad is finding his way again after a career dedicated solely to working for the church. My two sisters have many challenges that they are facing. I am in awe of what they have to handle and I pray they remain steady on the course. I also pray for Mom who is holding the fort: our rock. I belong to a family of fighters who rely heavily on their faith to make it through each day.

Jeremiah 29:11

"For I know the plans that I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Righting a Wrong with The Roast Beast...

So Team Canada dominated Germany last night. Although I caught the beginning moments at home, my wife and I had to attend a birthday party held over at the Fox hotel. Thankfully it was an executive suite and I got to watch the game on 3 very nice flat screen TVs ! Score!

As with any Filipino birthday party, the food totally rocked and we had our fill. But what totally blew me away was when they brought in this casket size cardboard box. They opened it up… And low in behold… Therein lay a roasted pig. A whole roasted pig. I’ve seen it in pictures, I’ve seen it in movies, and now here was one right before my eyes!

Being SDA, my wife and I didn’t partake of said beast but I was certainly fascinated by the spectacle of people digging in and devouring their share. I’m sorry to say I didn’t have a camera to take a picture of it but here is one I pulled off the internet that might as well be a twin to the one we had on site. Cost: $200 CAD!

It is tax time and my wife and I recently got our T4 and church contribution receipts. Tess quickly sent hers off to have her return computed because she is leaving for the Philippines at the end of March and would like some spending money for her trip. Because of her generosity in 2009, she’ll be expecting a decent amount which makes her happy.

I too am expecting some back and it got me thinking about how I have vowed to “right that wrong”. So, out of curiosity, I hopped onto the internet and did a quick search on EBay. My heart skipped a beat when this picture popped up…

So it is a year older… The 2004 model. It is a different colour… (I do like the silver though) It is sans the Thomson Elite parts, Specialized Avatar saddle, and Shimano 520 clipless pedals… And it has been somewhat domesticated (eww bike rack and low riding saddle!) … But other than that it is a mint condition Specialized Sirrus Sport Disc which is identical to the one I owned in Toronto ! The current bid for it is a measly $241.00 CAD. Not sure if I want to get into bidding war with whomever put that first bid and I certainly do have a limit of what I would spend on it (considering I have to factor in shipping cost and the modifications I’d want to start right away) but we’ll see. Stay tuned!

To end things off... We also got to watch the women's short program last night at the party and while Asians seem to be dominating the competition, here in Canada all eyes were on Joannie Rochette and I'm sure we all felt her tears once she got off the ice. I guess the pressure was off for the evening and the emotions overwhelmed her. I'm sure she was thinking of only one thing: her mom.

But did anyone notice how well defined this girl's arms are especially compared to her competition? They aren't gross like those crazy body builder types. Lean very lean! Her back is pretty defined too. Very nice.

Canada vs Russia tonight!

No Fat Lady Has Sung!

The following are just some slightly random thoughts on yesterday's game...

I have to admit I was heartbroken when I saw the final score for tonight's hockey game between Team Canada and Team USA. Canada is my much loved adopted homeland. Yes, many may say that I spent most of my late childhood and early teens in the United States but when I was mature enough to make a choice of which country's ideals to embrace, I readily chose Canada. I prefer the mosaic over the melting pot.

There is something highly symbolic about bringing our neighbours to the south onto our home turf and challenging them to our game. I think many other countries can relate to this opportunity. I think we all are a bit weary of the egocentric way the United States has conducted itself in other arenas and relish the idea of a level playing field. Even if... that field is made of ice.

Yes we were properly beaten. There a number of things that were just not coming together for our boys. The Americans have every right to be happy about their performance especialy in goal tending. But part of me does not appreciate the comments that more than a number of Americans made in regards to their win. No need to gloat now!

I am not a hardcore hockey fan. I don't have an expert analysis of the game. But I do know that hockey is a Canadian passion and obscession. I have joined many a Canadian family during Hockey Night in Canada and witnessed how their enthusiasm seems to reach into their TV sets and affect the outcome of the game. That is why I understood the tears that fell down the cheeks of the Albertan farmer I had the opportunity of sitting beside during the final moments of tonight's game. Do Americans have the same connection to baseball or NFL football?

I really hope the boys rise up to the occaison, collect themselves, focus on working as a team, and get back to it. In either case I've enjoyed the Olympics form the second I rushed into the street to see catch the exchange of the flame just a few feet from my workplace till now.

Go Canada Go!